These last couple of years have thrown
some of the lowest of the lows in my life. I have wanted to scream at
the top of my lungs about the injustices of this horrible world and
tell them where it was they needed to go and how fast they need to go
to get there.
While I would be completely justified
in doing such a thing, it wouldn't be right.
There are so many well-meaning people
who have and continue to advise me to be vindictive, to avenge all of
the wrongs that I have been dealt by those in my life, and I just
can't bring myself to do it.
Out of all the hatred that a person
such as myself has had thrown at them in my nearly 38 years by so
many...most of whom don't actually know me at all, (most of whom have
been of the male variety), I just can't imagine how those individuals
must feel deep inside.
To bully someone...To treat someone
worse than you have ever been treated yourself....To hate someone
simply because you can.
While I don't understand how these
people can continue on with their lives as if their behavior has
little or no consequences, it is they who will have to live with said
consequences. Whether it be on this earth or after. And they can (and
probably will) blame everyone else. I learned a long time ago, when I
left my parents', that one should not regret walking away from those
who bring sadness and destruction, those relationships that are
toxic.
Throughout the last several years, one
of the most difficult things that I am STILL having issues with
learning, is to just know that God is going to provide our needs.
I've done my share of panic, crying, asking 'why', and so many other
typically human and understandable reactions when one is placed in
the throes of financial instability. But every single time, God has
provided for us...Literally!
Philippians 4:19
There are a couple of things that I
notice about that verse...It says that 'God SHALL supply', not that
He might or that He can, it says that He WILL!
Isn't that amazing?!?!
The second thing that I notice about
this verse, is that He 'shall supply all your need', seriously, ALL,
not some.
I'll let that sink in.....
Something that I still have to
get a grip on however, is that what we think our needs are....They
may not be what the Lord sees as an actual need in our lives.
I have had those feelings of
disappointment over the fact that I am unable to buy my children
something small or give them a special outing, or go on a date with
my husband that involves more than just a coffee or ice cream cone.
I then have to take a step back and
look, actually LOOK at the many incredible blessings that are a part
of our lives.
- I have four beautiful, healthy, smart children, I have a husband who loves the Lord and accepted my daughters as if they were his own flesh and blood ,we have a warm home, I have a select few friends who I like to refer to as family more often than not....The list goes on and on...
I mean really, when we get mad and/or
frustrated at the short comings of our lives, what are we really
saying?
That WE know better than God as to what
we need in our lives?
Do I need to have my children cheerful
and perfect 24/7? Well....that's definitely something that I want,
but when my children fight with us or each other, it is teaching them
that they have a voice, that they are individuals and they also learn
boundaries and how to deal with other personalities. But respect and
honor are still a must, that is never up for debate.
Do I need thousands of dollars in a
bank account? Again, something that we want but not that we need.
God may be teaching us that we need to
humble ourselves and rely on Him to supply our needs. Maybe we have
to learn to ask God or others for help in such matters.
Now, if there are things that God has
pointed out that need to be changed or improved upon within an aspect
of your life, get off your butt and do what needs to be done!
Maybe some of the hardships you or I
are experiencing in our lives are as a result of the consequences of
our actions. (or they could be a result of someone else's
actions...that happens too.)
Just don't be so proud as to ignore the
inklings of what you need to do.
I am so thankful of the many blessings
that the Lord has given me. This year we had a massive miracle that
could only be explained as being 'a God thing'. I wish I could write
about THAT one on here, but suffice it to say....My heart is
overflowing with joy and thankfulness in the richness of God's mercy
and caring for His children. My praise will never be enough.
I am no longer able to have the girls
in our YouTube channel, I apologize for that however it is something
out of my/our control. I am now thinking about different ways to
continue on with it and would love to hear any suggestions from you,
my faithful readers. Are there any other aspects of my life that you
all would find interesting that I could put in YouTube form?
I enjoy writing, I just figured that
maybe I could try the whole YouTube 'thing' and see what that is all
about.
And remember, there's still a contact
button here on the blog and you can also make comments on my YouTube.
